How to keep your new girlfriend

How To keep your new girlfriend

Best way to keep your new girlfriend

How to keep your new girlfriend

Last Friday night you went out for your monthly payday night out with your mates.

This is an occurrence that happens regularly every month. On payday, hence the reason why it is called your payday monthly night out…It is the one night in the whole month when you can let your hair down, drink drink drink and go mad.

However, last Friday night was different. Your best mate John called you up about an hour before you were supposed to meet up with everyone and didn’t sound himself. So you asked him “What’s wrong?”…

He went on to explain that he and Shirl, his fiancé of 10 years, had finally split up. He was feeling cut up, depressed and down about it so tonight he doesn’t feel like going out and partying. You being a caring best friend said “Oh, I really am sorry, I understand just how much you loved her. So if you are feeling down then going out tonight John is precisely what you ‘do’ need. If you want I promise you we will tone it right down. Just have a couple of quiet beers and go home.” To which John replied, “Ok just a couple of quiet ones.” 

So the taxi arrives. You get in, head off and meet your mates.

The night starts quite quiet. You’re all sitting around the table trying to console your good friend John. You get a few more drinks in. Pete, your other mate, cracks a joke about having a quiet night. Saying “Yeah Sure” and you all roll about laughing. You get a few more drinks in and by now John is beginning to forget just how upset he is. 

A few more drinks are consumed then your favourite song starts blasting out of the Jukebox. Now you are so drunk you decide to get up on top of the table and start breakdancing. Not very well may I add. At this point, your mates are now wetting themselves with laughter. However, you don’t care because you have waited all month for this night and you’re gonna make damn sure you enjoy it.

More drinks go round and now you are all standing on top of the table shouting and singing at the top of your voices. It’s the song ‘Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You.’


Well, that night wasn’t quiet. The drinks were flowing the music was banging and you all ended up having a wicked night out.

The Aftermath 

drunk with a pizza

On the way home, you stopped off because you needed pizza.

You’re standing in the queue for a taxi, you’re drunk you have pizza down your shirt and the next thing you know you stumble over the shoe of a young woman. You can’t remember exactly what you said. You can’t even remember her name or what she even looked like.

The following night you receive a text message saying you promise to call. Thank you. From Becks. You have absolutely no idea who Becks is and why she’s thanking you.

Suddenly it dawns on you this was the woman you bumped into the night before. You think to yourself how did she get my number? I can’t even remember my number.

So you text back “I’m terribly sorry but please let me make it up to you by taking you out for a drink.”

 The next thing you know she texts you back and says “that would be lovely when would you like to meet?” 

You reply “I’m a little bit busy tonight but can we please meet up tomorrow?”

And she replies, “yes!”

Over the next few nights, you both start seeing each other and texting each other nearly all the time.

A week on and you have a new girlfriend.


So what is the best way to keep this new girlfriend?

Let’s for a moment just analyse what has happened here.

You met a girl. You were drunk. Covered in pizza. You forgot to call her. You couldn’t remember her name or what she looked like but the next thing you know without even trying she is now your new girlfriend. 

Our essential guy advice to you is if you want to keep this girlfriend just carry on the path that you have been travelling on. Don’t try too hard and just let it all happen naturally.


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