Being someone’s best man is a fantastic honour, but it also carries a great deal of responsibility, such as knowing how to write a best man speech. If the best man is expected to give a wedding speech at the reception, now is the time to start preparing for it.
We understand that being nervous about giving a toast in front of a group of people is completely understandable, especially if public speaking isn’t your strong suit. However, in the event that you plan and prepare thoroughly for your best man speech, you’ll be able to wow everyone in no time. Some pointers on how to write an engaging, concise, and to-the-point best man speech and how to deliver it effectively follow.
Tips on giving a best man speech
So, what is the ideal way to compose a best man speech? If you’ve been awarded the honour of being the best man, consider yourself lucky. Review the advice provided below to prevent pre-speech anxiousness and to ensure smooth delivery.
Plan a head of time
It is recommended that you give yourself at least one month to write your best man speech if you are not reading this the night before the wedding ceremony. The weeks leading up to the wedding, especially if you’re a prominent bridal party member, may be very stressful for everyone involved. Furthermore, with all of the activities you will be persuaded or required to participate in, you may get disoriented and lose track of time (on top of keeping up with your personal life). Consequently, it is advisable to prepare ahead of time to lessen some of the stress associated with crafting a fantastic best man address.
Grab Their Attention
Start your speech with a memorable one-liner to grab everyone’s attention and set the tone for the rest of the speech.
If you’re uncertain of how to begin a best man speech, we recommend strolling onto the dance floor and welcoming the guests directly. Starting with an introduction of yourself as the best man, you should go on to offer gratitude to those whom you consider deserving special recognition. The couple’s parents should be thanked for raising such lovely children, as should your friend who invited you and the others who attended. Thanking the bartender for a few giggles could also be appropriate. Using this strategy, you may break the ice, ease into the best man speech, and guarantee that those who deserve to be recognised get recognised.
Practise (not just in the mirror)
This proposal is really necessary. First and foremost, practise delivering your speech aloud at least three times, even if you feel you have it down pat. Then, using your phone, record a video and play it back to get a feel of how things are going in real-time. Finally, email it to a close friend who will not be attending the wedding and ask him or her to offer you honest feedback.
Talk about your relationship with the groom
Apart from introducing yourself, one of the most important aspects of crafting a best man speech is detailing your relationship with the groom. Talk about how you met him, how long you’ve known him, and what a great friend he is with your friends. If you want to describe him as charming, warm-hearted, or thoughtful, tell him a storey or tell him an anecdote that perfectly encompasses his personality traits. The best man speech should be humorous, but if you’re going to use an anecdote, make sure to tie it back to his partner in some way, if at all possible. Example: He may be outgoing yet forgetful, but his new wife may be more attentive and well-organized. You may use his forgetfulness as a fantastic opener, and then follow up with a storey about a time when you saw his partner’s organizational talents help him out tremendously—and that’s when you realized they were the genuine deal.
Write it down
You should memorise your speech if you have an exceptional memory, but having a written speech or a few bullet points to refer to can give you more confidence and help you to stay on course. Nerves may mess with your memory, so don’t be discouraged if you have to bring notes with you. Instead of sheets of paper, it is advised that you use little note cards. The simplicity of reading from a smartphone has prompted many groomsmen to do so in recent years.
Focus on the bride and groom
As a best man, you may begin your toast by sharing an inside joke and reminiscing about the early days of your relationship with the groom, but you should then go on to the time when he met his future wife-to-be. Consider creating a storey that captures the essence of their relationship. If you can, describe the exact moment you realised his spouse was “The One” for him and how you came to that conclusion. Perhaps your buddy told you that they would be married a week after meeting his partner, and you thought he was insane, yet here you are, married to him. The groom may have been known to you for quite some time if you’re the groom’s brother or if you’ve been best friends since elementary school. You’ve surely had visions of what his perfect wife would look like throughout your life, but the lady in front of you far exceeds even your wildest fantasies. Reiterate how wonderful a guy he is and how happy you are for your friend that he has found someone who is so suited for him.
Keep it short and sweet
The best man speech is usually given first, followed by the maid of honour’s toast and parent speeches. Even though you’ll be speaking first, a good best man speech should be brief and sweet to prevent people from becoming agitated throughout the other speeches. Aim for a three- to five-minute best man speech at the most. Keep in mind that it will seem a lot shorter to you when you’re making the speech, and you’ll probably hurry through it a little bit.
Speak Clearly (Don’t mumble)
If you give a fantastic best man speech in a monotone, it becomes uninteresting, and if everyone is straining to hear you, it becomes nonexistent. But, on the other hand, if you don’t speak confidently and slowly, all of your speech practice will be for nothing!
No alcohol before hand
Keep your alcohol consumption to a bare minimum until you’ve completed giving your best man speech. It’s natural to want to ease your anxieties, but having more than one drink during cocktail hour might backfire—alcohol will just accentuate your fears and emotions (and you risk slurring your words!). The more you drink, the less likely you are to recall what you’ve prepared and create coherent ideas in the limelight. You’ll have plenty of time to rejoice when your speech is over.
Have a backup plan
If your speech begins to falter, just divert the audience’s attention to the pair and exclaim, ‘Aren’t they a wonderful couple?!’ Your audience will always applaud when you do this.
Finish on a high note with a congratulations or toast
This is a sure way to wrap off your best man speech. Finally, congratulate the happy couple on their wedding day and raise a glass to their continued happiness. A personal speech, a funny toast, or a quotation are all options. Perhaps you might offer a statement about love and relationships from one of the groom’s favourite comedians or films, or just wish the newlyweds well and encourage your other guests to raise their glasses in celebration.
Things to avoid in a best man speech
You want to take the spotlight off yourself and on the happy couple and their future while writing a decent speech. Therefore, it’s advisable to stay away from the following items in general:
No matter how relevant or amusing it may seem to your friends, your friend’s grandma does not need to hear about that one notorious night in college. So keep your best man speech PG and save the drunken tales and humiliating anecdotes for the bachelor party.
Talk of exes
It’s not the time to bring up ex-girlfriends or prior relationships at your friend’s wedding. So leave it out, no matter how amazing a tale you believe it is.
Bad & Rude Language
Do you see a pattern here? You want to make sure that everyone, from the 80-year-old visitors to the 8-year-old guests, enjoys your best man speech. Remember that a wedding is a family gathering, so avoid using profanity or other PG-13 languages.
As previously said, your best man speech should be brief and pleasant. The last thing you want is for your wedding guests to fade out halfway through your turn in the limelight, no matter how good your speech is if a narrative requires more than a few words to describe, condense it or find another way to write your best man speech.